Hey Guys,
Thought I'd let you all in on what's going on. While Vol. 1 is still underway, I managed to revise and re-release Taking Over Me. With some restructuring and good editing, the book is good to go. Walk This Realm will be getting the text-only treatment too, however, as a means for it to not feel like left overs, I'm putting it on hold until I can write more material geared towards its subject matter. It may be a successor to TOM, however, I don't want it to feel like it's some B-sides to it. As a standalone in text, it falls significantly short in contrast.
I can't wait for school to start again towards end of August after my show. Heck, the show itself is going to be exciting! It'll be my first gig in a year and instead of being nervous, I'm just stoked!
I also noticed something recently that's a bit unusual of me. I've caught myself smiling more often. Usually, I'm very stone faced, neutral, grim and what have you. To see me smile, usually, you'd need to make me laugh. Sometimes, I have to force the smile. As of late, though, it's come more natural to me and I don't feel as shy about it now. I like the feeling, even though I don't quite get it yet.
The weird thing I've noticed lately is how this week a lot of people have been telling me about the crap they're going through, all of which I'm keeping to myself, being who and how I am. I honestly haven't found myself in that position in a long time. You'd think I'd feel low or something due to hearing people vent or verbalize their concerns, worries and stuff on me. Honestly, the way I handle is this -- I'll hear you out but at the end of it all, when I'm by myself and in a serene place loaded with empty space and silence, I take it to the Big Man. I can't carry anyone's cross but I sure as heck know the One who can help carry the burden. I can listen and help up to my own limit but in the end, I'm not the one that can make things change for the better all the time. This may not be much to say but this is all I got for now.
Below are the links to buy Taking Over Me:
http://www.lulu.com/product/file-download/taking-over-me/16341084?productTrackingContext=search_results/search_shelf/center/4
http://www.lulu.com/product/paperback/taking-over-me/16341083?productTrackingContext=search_results/search_shelf/center/3
Blogs by Ron Gunz
7.28.2011
7.23.2011
Where has the Wind taken You?
Wondering where you are these days
since the last time we spoke and the last time I've seen you
almost seems like yesterday
that you faded from my world and into the grey
feels like ages that I haven't heard you breathe
because every word spoken was laughter for me
so the silence brings a sting
because the echo is gone, feels it won't be for long
the wind took you away
from our paradise that was only to begin
the leaves resemble ash
in pieces we are, i guess there's no looking back
so this toast I ode to you
somewhere out there, you're no longer in pain
this is the last goodbye
as you fly into peace and never again to cry
since the last time we spoke and the last time I've seen you
almost seems like yesterday
that you faded from my world and into the grey
feels like ages that I haven't heard you breathe
because every word spoken was laughter for me
so the silence brings a sting
because the echo is gone, feels it won't be for long
the wind took you away
from our paradise that was only to begin
the leaves resemble ash
in pieces we are, i guess there's no looking back
so this toast I ode to you
somewhere out there, you're no longer in pain
this is the last goodbye
as you fly into peace and never again to cry
7.19.2011
Just Elevating and Re-mounted Wings
Of all songs, I'm here listening to So High by John Legend off his Get Lifted album. Why? The ol' romantic side of me as a man just rolled in. Heck, I wouldn't be shocked if I found myself reading Songs of Solomon within the next few days. The feeling that love tends to bring about is both maddening as well as blissful. It makes your heart skip a beat every now and then, leaves you with more stutters than George W. Bush and it'll make you do things you would never do in a million years.
It's amazing what happens on one sick day with me -- I find myself inspired to write. For once, it's a great vibe that is inspiring me to write a little. Those who follow me on FB may have noticed on one status how I started to point out my strengths. Some would exploit that or point it out as supposedly feminine. Last I checked, it is definitely healthy for people to remember and declare your strengths instead of wallowing in your weaknesses. Why? If you focus on your negatives all the time, you'll find yourself just feeling blue or just frustrated all the time. I'm not saying we should be foolishly optimistic, as I am at times. I just believe that when you focus more on your strengths, the weaknesses and imperfections about you won't beat you up nowhere near as bad.
In the process, I'm remembering more of what makes Ron Gunz the man he is, was and will always be. It isn't the brokenness, the blues, the dramatics, the moping and the sorrow. Yes, these are things that we deal with on a daily basis and things that put our character to the test -- but they don't define me in their essence. I began to remember today everything I know to be awesome about me -- whether it be being the musician I am -- no reading of music, just all ear, heart and soul, being a strong writer who's loaded with raw honesty and grit, a motivator that helps bring some sunshine to people when the funk and junk of life hit 'em or simply being a man of passion who enjoys what he enjoys very well and keeps pushing even when on my threshold.
Yup, no more pity parties for me! You mope, whine, pee, moan and groan all your life and you'll be well-headed to a road to nowhere. Sure enough, being laid the smackdown is all you'll be known for unless you jump back up and open a can of worms and stomp a mudhole in life's derriere. Last I checked, the weak must say I am strong.
Ron Gunz
It's amazing what happens on one sick day with me -- I find myself inspired to write. For once, it's a great vibe that is inspiring me to write a little. Those who follow me on FB may have noticed on one status how I started to point out my strengths. Some would exploit that or point it out as supposedly feminine. Last I checked, it is definitely healthy for people to remember and declare your strengths instead of wallowing in your weaknesses. Why? If you focus on your negatives all the time, you'll find yourself just feeling blue or just frustrated all the time. I'm not saying we should be foolishly optimistic, as I am at times. I just believe that when you focus more on your strengths, the weaknesses and imperfections about you won't beat you up nowhere near as bad.
In the process, I'm remembering more of what makes Ron Gunz the man he is, was and will always be. It isn't the brokenness, the blues, the dramatics, the moping and the sorrow. Yes, these are things that we deal with on a daily basis and things that put our character to the test -- but they don't define me in their essence. I began to remember today everything I know to be awesome about me -- whether it be being the musician I am -- no reading of music, just all ear, heart and soul, being a strong writer who's loaded with raw honesty and grit, a motivator that helps bring some sunshine to people when the funk and junk of life hit 'em or simply being a man of passion who enjoys what he enjoys very well and keeps pushing even when on my threshold.
Yup, no more pity parties for me! You mope, whine, pee, moan and groan all your life and you'll be well-headed to a road to nowhere. Sure enough, being laid the smackdown is all you'll be known for unless you jump back up and open a can of worms and stomp a mudhole in life's derriere. Last I checked, the weak must say I am strong.
Ron Gunz
7.17.2011
What do you want to be in THIS life?
So I was at the Renaissance with Lars, Bryan and Crystal last night and we talked about various things -- career, life, music, work, issues, etc. As we departed, I found myself headed to the train with Bryan and Crystal. Bryan, as we go in the A train asks me, what do I want to be in this life? Why does this matter? People always ask what do you want to be when you grow up or what you want to do in the here and now. To ask me what I want to be in this life, all of which is brief as well as enduring, that meant something to me. Many people find themselves needing to figure out what the hell they want because either life is so rushed into their face or so many things that cause confusion hammer at them from the front, back and sideways. Pat me on the back or tear me down if you will but I know what I want for certain, all things considered.
I want to be a kick@$$ musician that inspires a new generation. I aim to be a prolific writer that causes the minds and hearts of people to stir in a way that makes them reevaluate and cherish their lives. I want to be a wonderful role model for my future students in this lifetime instead of being another stumbling block. I desire to be happily married to a woman who will love me for who I am and compliment me in my weak points and vice versa. I want to be an honorable husband and a dedicated, loving father. Most of all, which is something I somehow lost sight of while on the way there, is to reflect God in all that I do -- through my music, through my job, through my writing, through my character and through my walk in life.
I realize I still have quite the road ahead of me. I need to actually hit up someone I know and get some legit recording started. I continue the road to my dream career this fall. Sure as heck, I'm still learning what it is to be passionate, loving, caring and understanding while also cautious. I need to get back to the roots of my faith and hang the damn on to it. Bryan asked me what's stopping me. Honestly, it's just been motivation and some laziness altogether. There had also been some doubt in myself lingering -- which was something my ladyfriend kinda brought to the light while we were at the Joan Jett concert. It was a wake up call at best and a realization at worst. You live and learn right?
I want to be a kick@$$ musician that inspires a new generation. I aim to be a prolific writer that causes the minds and hearts of people to stir in a way that makes them reevaluate and cherish their lives. I want to be a wonderful role model for my future students in this lifetime instead of being another stumbling block. I desire to be happily married to a woman who will love me for who I am and compliment me in my weak points and vice versa. I want to be an honorable husband and a dedicated, loving father. Most of all, which is something I somehow lost sight of while on the way there, is to reflect God in all that I do -- through my music, through my job, through my writing, through my character and through my walk in life.
I realize I still have quite the road ahead of me. I need to actually hit up someone I know and get some legit recording started. I continue the road to my dream career this fall. Sure as heck, I'm still learning what it is to be passionate, loving, caring and understanding while also cautious. I need to get back to the roots of my faith and hang the damn on to it. Bryan asked me what's stopping me. Honestly, it's just been motivation and some laziness altogether. There had also been some doubt in myself lingering -- which was something my ladyfriend kinda brought to the light while we were at the Joan Jett concert. It was a wake up call at best and a realization at worst. You live and learn right?
7.10.2011
Remembering your Faith.
This one is really random. I didn't plan to write this one until I started rolling in a convo with a friend, as well as while I was thinking. I began to remember two old friends that I grew up in church with. On one end, you had Cruz Ramos and on the other end, you had Julio Rios. I don't ever even recall talkin' much about them but when it comes to my faith, they both hold a certain place in my life.
Cruz was your ultimate test of your ability to listen. It is rare that you ever got to talk. She would go on and on and on. Men, if you complain about your gf/fiancee/wife,you need to stop right now. This woman would keep you on the phone about 2 hours max -- and you would not say much. You would sit down and listen, nothing more.
The other thing is that she truly was a woman of faith. She had diabetes, was going blind, was almost headed to her 80's and lived alone about as long as I can remember. Even with all the sickness she was going through, nothing broke her faith. She showed that God has a way of giving inexplicable joy and adding extra peace to ease the pain. Like, damn it, she was strong. As Pastor Ricky would say, "if you're gonna be stubborn, be stubborn for Jesus". Her passing away was like trying to keep the Undertaker down when he wrestled Triple H at WrestleMania 27. Every time it looked like she was done, she kept getting back up and kept recovering. After they had removed life support, she was recovering out of nowhere that we thought she was gonna leave the hospital before month's end. Then she just passed on. I wonder sometimes if that's a rare after-effect upon removing life support.
Then you had Julio Rios -- one of the best damn pianists the world never got to know. He played keys the way I like it best -- with that classical and very clean tone and sound. I never been into horns or organs or that Mr. Rogers kinda sound. Dang it did he know how to fill the room the second he'd play on that keyboard. He loved music. This guy loved people too. I think a lot of my love for people came from his influence. This guy didn't just play in church -- the streets weren't a stranger to him, much less Riker's Island. I don't find it odd that I once had a privilege of playing at Riker's years after his passing with a person or two that also played with him. Julio was such a little kid on the inside as well. When he had a surgery (I think on his spleen), he showed us his stitches by dropping his pants! Thank God he had us fooled and it only dropped to the side to see the stitches.
He also dealt with diabetes to the point that he was on dialysis every month or so. It was grueling, especially for his wife Tonita. That woman always took care of him. Then there was that time he had a kidney surgery of some sort. Not fun and definitely had him away from us at church. We missed him a lot to the point that church was hard to be in without him. I look back and I don't see it as idolatry, it was more like he was a role model to every individual that attended.
He also gave me the push to play and sing. I think that thanks to him, playing guitar and bass simply came to me just a little better. Everyone knew him as the pianist but damn it he was one rabid guitarist and bassist too. Basswise, he had latin written all over him. As a guitarist, he was everywhere but there was also something Beatles-esque about him to a George Harrison degree.
The night that I heard he was at the hospital is still fresh in my mind. Dad and I jetted over to see him the first chance we got. He was over in a wonderful hospital in the Bronx. They had great food too. He ended up there due to falling off a ladder and shattered his leg, which required surgery. Somehow it also affected his diabetes and his kidney. Surgery was done and for the most part, he was improving. Again, in his innocent nature, he lifts up his robe and shows the stitches. Not a pretty sight I gotta say.
As time went on, he was almost gonna get cleared. I got to see him and this time, he grabbed my guitar and schooled me a bit. That was the last time I saw him in a state of consciousness. Days later, he ended up in a coma in a near-vegetable state. It was hell. There was still sign of life but the countdown had begun. No improvements whatsoever. Dad and I saw him for the last time. It was a hard sight to see because you couldn't help but know that as soon as life support gets cut off, he'll be headed home with the Lord. We said our last goodbyes and said a prayer. As we left, I couldn't help but notice a smirk form on Julio's face. I really wish he had recovered from there but who knows why it never happened. He passed on. His wife's health had gone into decline since then. From heart troubles to lung issues, it was looking as though his death was physically crippling him. Crazy as it is, you know you love someone when the death of someone you love can impact you that strongly. She passed on barely a year after.
That man never let go of his faith despite his health's decline and neither did Cruz. Like, damn, we deal with issues of money, relationships with people, grades, art, music, etc. but every time I remember the crap Julio and Cruz went through, it pushes me to grab my balls and toughen up and realize how much easier I got it compared to how they got it. Like, damn, I got it good. Granted, there are situations even worse than theirs but dang does it push me to believe in simply living and make me realize how much more it means to be told to "cherish your life" as Jigsaw would say.
I'll close with this, make good with your life while you're young so that when you get old and wrinkly, you don't find yourself going (pardon the profanity), "F***, what was I thinking?!". Give yourself (when get old) good reasons to say what it says on my ladyfriend's right shoulder blade, "No Excuses, No Apologies, No Regrets".
Cruz was your ultimate test of your ability to listen. It is rare that you ever got to talk. She would go on and on and on. Men, if you complain about your gf/fiancee/wife,you need to stop right now. This woman would keep you on the phone about 2 hours max -- and you would not say much. You would sit down and listen, nothing more.
The other thing is that she truly was a woman of faith. She had diabetes, was going blind, was almost headed to her 80's and lived alone about as long as I can remember. Even with all the sickness she was going through, nothing broke her faith. She showed that God has a way of giving inexplicable joy and adding extra peace to ease the pain. Like, damn it, she was strong. As Pastor Ricky would say, "if you're gonna be stubborn, be stubborn for Jesus". Her passing away was like trying to keep the Undertaker down when he wrestled Triple H at WrestleMania 27. Every time it looked like she was done, she kept getting back up and kept recovering. After they had removed life support, she was recovering out of nowhere that we thought she was gonna leave the hospital before month's end. Then she just passed on. I wonder sometimes if that's a rare after-effect upon removing life support.
Then you had Julio Rios -- one of the best damn pianists the world never got to know. He played keys the way I like it best -- with that classical and very clean tone and sound. I never been into horns or organs or that Mr. Rogers kinda sound. Dang it did he know how to fill the room the second he'd play on that keyboard. He loved music. This guy loved people too. I think a lot of my love for people came from his influence. This guy didn't just play in church -- the streets weren't a stranger to him, much less Riker's Island. I don't find it odd that I once had a privilege of playing at Riker's years after his passing with a person or two that also played with him. Julio was such a little kid on the inside as well. When he had a surgery (I think on his spleen), he showed us his stitches by dropping his pants! Thank God he had us fooled and it only dropped to the side to see the stitches.
He also dealt with diabetes to the point that he was on dialysis every month or so. It was grueling, especially for his wife Tonita. That woman always took care of him. Then there was that time he had a kidney surgery of some sort. Not fun and definitely had him away from us at church. We missed him a lot to the point that church was hard to be in without him. I look back and I don't see it as idolatry, it was more like he was a role model to every individual that attended.
He also gave me the push to play and sing. I think that thanks to him, playing guitar and bass simply came to me just a little better. Everyone knew him as the pianist but damn it he was one rabid guitarist and bassist too. Basswise, he had latin written all over him. As a guitarist, he was everywhere but there was also something Beatles-esque about him to a George Harrison degree.
The night that I heard he was at the hospital is still fresh in my mind. Dad and I jetted over to see him the first chance we got. He was over in a wonderful hospital in the Bronx. They had great food too. He ended up there due to falling off a ladder and shattered his leg, which required surgery. Somehow it also affected his diabetes and his kidney. Surgery was done and for the most part, he was improving. Again, in his innocent nature, he lifts up his robe and shows the stitches. Not a pretty sight I gotta say.
As time went on, he was almost gonna get cleared. I got to see him and this time, he grabbed my guitar and schooled me a bit. That was the last time I saw him in a state of consciousness. Days later, he ended up in a coma in a near-vegetable state. It was hell. There was still sign of life but the countdown had begun. No improvements whatsoever. Dad and I saw him for the last time. It was a hard sight to see because you couldn't help but know that as soon as life support gets cut off, he'll be headed home with the Lord. We said our last goodbyes and said a prayer. As we left, I couldn't help but notice a smirk form on Julio's face. I really wish he had recovered from there but who knows why it never happened. He passed on. His wife's health had gone into decline since then. From heart troubles to lung issues, it was looking as though his death was physically crippling him. Crazy as it is, you know you love someone when the death of someone you love can impact you that strongly. She passed on barely a year after.
That man never let go of his faith despite his health's decline and neither did Cruz. Like, damn, we deal with issues of money, relationships with people, grades, art, music, etc. but every time I remember the crap Julio and Cruz went through, it pushes me to grab my balls and toughen up and realize how much easier I got it compared to how they got it. Like, damn, I got it good. Granted, there are situations even worse than theirs but dang does it push me to believe in simply living and make me realize how much more it means to be told to "cherish your life" as Jigsaw would say.
I'll close with this, make good with your life while you're young so that when you get old and wrinkly, you don't find yourself going (pardon the profanity), "F***, what was I thinking?!". Give yourself (when get old) good reasons to say what it says on my ladyfriend's right shoulder blade, "No Excuses, No Apologies, No Regrets".
7.07.2011
Forgiveness: Deja Vu?
I feel like I've written about this before. However, not in the light I'm about to write it in. I had a talk with a particular person this past weekend as well as this week. It was about forgiving and forgetting. I got to admit, when you dig deep inside and see yourself, you can see the good, the bad and the (excuse my profanity) fucking ugly inside. I got to think and see for myself something I thought would never be an issue...until Tuesday night.
I came to realize that I forgive and not really forget. Sure, some would say you don't forget. The problem? If you are constantly reminding yourself at the slightest moment of weakness of the thing you've forgiven, you will never put it behind you and in turn, you haven't forgiven at all. Love bears no record of wrongs, folks. I came to realize that deep down, I was still holding on to hurt that had been sitting in my heart for years. Everyone that knows me well know that I've been backstabbed, betrayed, double-crossed, cheated, wronged and defrauded. They say you grow numb to it after a while but instead, it became fuel. My biggest problem as to why I've never let go? It had been my fuel for working out. So long as I'm not pissed, there'd be no reason to beat the crap out of the heavy bag. When I hit that bag, I summon the most inner anger I can find and let me tell you, I find a lot of it that I thought I forgot. I feel great once it's gone but once I go up to the bag again, I got nothing to fuel me up again.
But alas I found my way of ridding it forever. I forgave in my heart every liar, cheater, two-faced S.O.B. and any other type of person that may have offended me -- and toss it out of my life. I'm freaking 26, what am I doing holding grudges, pain and anger? You can only go on until you realize that holding all that in does nothing. Sure, there are lessons learned from them but why hold on to the bitterness? It cripples your mindset and sure as hell becomes a hinderance to your relationships with God, friends, family and a special someone. Someone once said, "Please, you'll never forget it". Not entirely. So long as you aren't reminded of those things, you don't have a thing to worry about. Easier said than done? True, however , not impossible. It takes time. Some people, it picks up fast and in others a little more time. I'm somewhere in between. So long as there is a consistent level of mutual love and respect, trust is easy for me to put into use in my life and in turn makes forgetting past wrongs a whole lot easier.
Why? The last thing you need is to let it eat you up inside and turn you in something that is a mere shadow of who you are. When bitterness takes a hold, it hides from the person you love the person they fell in love with, it distorts how your friends try to engage and help you and sure as heck brings destruction to family life, too.
I don't know (quite honestly) if this will help anyone but if it does, that means everything. The one thing that has been drilling in my head today has been, "Love bears no record of wrongs" and in so manner, it is also written, "Love Expels All Fear"
- Ron Gunz
I came to realize that I forgive and not really forget. Sure, some would say you don't forget. The problem? If you are constantly reminding yourself at the slightest moment of weakness of the thing you've forgiven, you will never put it behind you and in turn, you haven't forgiven at all. Love bears no record of wrongs, folks. I came to realize that deep down, I was still holding on to hurt that had been sitting in my heart for years. Everyone that knows me well know that I've been backstabbed, betrayed, double-crossed, cheated, wronged and defrauded. They say you grow numb to it after a while but instead, it became fuel. My biggest problem as to why I've never let go? It had been my fuel for working out. So long as I'm not pissed, there'd be no reason to beat the crap out of the heavy bag. When I hit that bag, I summon the most inner anger I can find and let me tell you, I find a lot of it that I thought I forgot. I feel great once it's gone but once I go up to the bag again, I got nothing to fuel me up again.
But alas I found my way of ridding it forever. I forgave in my heart every liar, cheater, two-faced S.O.B. and any other type of person that may have offended me -- and toss it out of my life. I'm freaking 26, what am I doing holding grudges, pain and anger? You can only go on until you realize that holding all that in does nothing. Sure, there are lessons learned from them but why hold on to the bitterness? It cripples your mindset and sure as hell becomes a hinderance to your relationships with God, friends, family and a special someone. Someone once said, "Please, you'll never forget it". Not entirely. So long as you aren't reminded of those things, you don't have a thing to worry about. Easier said than done? True, however , not impossible. It takes time. Some people, it picks up fast and in others a little more time. I'm somewhere in between. So long as there is a consistent level of mutual love and respect, trust is easy for me to put into use in my life and in turn makes forgetting past wrongs a whole lot easier.
Why? The last thing you need is to let it eat you up inside and turn you in something that is a mere shadow of who you are. When bitterness takes a hold, it hides from the person you love the person they fell in love with, it distorts how your friends try to engage and help you and sure as heck brings destruction to family life, too.
I don't know (quite honestly) if this will help anyone but if it does, that means everything. The one thing that has been drilling in my head today has been, "Love bears no record of wrongs" and in so manner, it is also written, "Love Expels All Fear"
- Ron Gunz
7.05.2011
Me and Skulls, apparent weight jumps and drops
Hey guys,
I thought I'd change up the blog this time by talk about something I never really brought up -- my thing with skulls. Almost everyone that has known me over the years know that I have always dug skulls. This goes as far back as the 90's -- with Bret Hart's logo, which consisted of a heart that included a skull with wings. That was possibly the first time I looked at a skull and went, "Oooooooh! Cool!" Then Street Fighter II: The Animated Movie came out and what was M. Bison's logo? Skull with a crack on its head -- and wings! Guess who is still one of my top favorites in Mortal Kombat? Scorpion and guess what happens when he removes his mask for that scorching fatality? A burning skull! Guess who's logo was my favorite in the post-Bret Hart Attitude Era in WWF? Stone Cold Steve Austin's of course. Why? His logo is a skull and in some cases, either a smoking skull, a cracked skull or a red eyed skull. Guess which shirt I have of Killswitch Engage? The one with three sabre-tooth tiger skulls! Their logo? Skull with wings. On top of that, I liked the special edition of their As Daylight Dies album not only because of the bonus tracks but also due to their new cover -- shattered glass with a skull in the middle! Black Label Society's logo? A skull. My favorite Iron Maiden album cover? Brave New World. Why? Skull in the sky. My Alter Bridge t-shirt has, guess what? Skull with wings!
The funny thing is this -- how we've interpreted the symbol of the skull and the meaning of it. To a lot of people, it symbolizes death, warning of danger, etc. I've looked to see what the skull with wings meant. I'm very sure to the ultra-conservative, it would mean the elevation of death or something like that but thus far, the meaning happens to be (for motorcyclists), "Good luck and happy journeys". I never really had a negative stigma for skulls for the simple fact that 1. they look so cool and 2. the place where Jesus died for our sins. What's it called? Golgotha (former name to my band, Brotherhood Of Outcasts by the way) which means, "place of a skull" or "hill of the skull".
So yeah, I've never hated the skull or been scared off or gone very reserved about skulls -- I always had an affinity to it. However, I hate how they're designed at times. I'm looking at the knuckleheads from Avenged Sevenfold. I despise your skull with bat wings logo. It is the only skull with wings logo that I never had a thing for. The one that's most curious to me, though, is the Skull and Bones society. We see it in the Pirates of the Caribbean movies, we've seen it in cartoons growing up and so forth (their logo anyway). Skull and crossed bones. The best part -- the number on the skull (or underneath it in some cases -- 322. Why? That's my birthday -- March 22. I'm sure I'm just over-analyzing it but hey, one can dream right?
Now what does the skull or skull with wings mean to me? Honestly, just effing coolness! I put that baby on and it's smooth sailing from there. For me, I have always loved how it has that sense of aggression, that sense of, "hey buddy, get the F out of my way" and that level of badassery . Symbol of death? Sure, why not! I dig it. If you're scared of death or have a sense of fear to it, then it ain't for you. As for me, I dig it. Why? In a strange twist, it also crawls its way back to my faith. When you get baptized, it's a way of putting your old self in a grave and in essence, death is happening and a birth is also happening. To a Christian, they have no business being scared of death. After all, even Johnny Cash sang what Paul said, "Oh death, where is thy sting? Oh grave, where is thy victory?". God seemed to have a cool angel to send out to kill the firstborn son of everyone that oppressed the Hebrews in Egypt. Heck, even Metallica wrote a song in memory to that, Creeping Death remember? The fact that Jesus died on the Hill of the Skull (Golgotha) has a buttkickin' sense of symbolism to it. Add in his resurrection and it's like making a fool out of death because it couldn't hold Him down. Where am I going with this? Absolutely nowhere, I just wanted to pour out my thoughts and feelings that come about when I think of skulls or skulls with wings and why I've never been offended but rather got a kick out of them.
Now on to another subject -- my weight. Dear God and thank heaven, I'm 235 right now! Now here's the retarded thing -- my weight-shifting issue from high school is back. I foresaw this but had the false hope that it wouldn't repeat itself. Back in my FDR days, one week I'd be 230, the next 240, drop down to 230 again, go up to 250, drop to 240, up to 260, drop down to 230 again and so on. All this in week intervals! Two weeks ago, I was 230 and then last week, I hit 258! By week's end, I went down to 252 and as of yesterday, I'm 235! I tried seeing if the scale was broke but hey, a five pound dumbbell weighed five pounds on those days I weighed myself. So clearly, by all means, my body is retarded. Maybe it's the humidity of NY summer weather, maybe it's all the water (or retention of it) but my body is clearly nuts! This keeps up and once I renew my health insurance, I'll look into a little bit of skin reduction because this is just wacky.
I thought I'd change up the blog this time by talk about something I never really brought up -- my thing with skulls. Almost everyone that has known me over the years know that I have always dug skulls. This goes as far back as the 90's -- with Bret Hart's logo, which consisted of a heart that included a skull with wings. That was possibly the first time I looked at a skull and went, "Oooooooh! Cool!" Then Street Fighter II: The Animated Movie came out and what was M. Bison's logo? Skull with a crack on its head -- and wings! Guess who is still one of my top favorites in Mortal Kombat? Scorpion and guess what happens when he removes his mask for that scorching fatality? A burning skull! Guess who's logo was my favorite in the post-Bret Hart Attitude Era in WWF? Stone Cold Steve Austin's of course. Why? His logo is a skull and in some cases, either a smoking skull, a cracked skull or a red eyed skull. Guess which shirt I have of Killswitch Engage? The one with three sabre-tooth tiger skulls! Their logo? Skull with wings. On top of that, I liked the special edition of their As Daylight Dies album not only because of the bonus tracks but also due to their new cover -- shattered glass with a skull in the middle! Black Label Society's logo? A skull. My favorite Iron Maiden album cover? Brave New World. Why? Skull in the sky. My Alter Bridge t-shirt has, guess what? Skull with wings!
The funny thing is this -- how we've interpreted the symbol of the skull and the meaning of it. To a lot of people, it symbolizes death, warning of danger, etc. I've looked to see what the skull with wings meant. I'm very sure to the ultra-conservative, it would mean the elevation of death or something like that but thus far, the meaning happens to be (for motorcyclists), "Good luck and happy journeys". I never really had a negative stigma for skulls for the simple fact that 1. they look so cool and 2. the place where Jesus died for our sins. What's it called? Golgotha (former name to my band, Brotherhood Of Outcasts by the way) which means, "place of a skull" or "hill of the skull".
So yeah, I've never hated the skull or been scared off or gone very reserved about skulls -- I always had an affinity to it. However, I hate how they're designed at times. I'm looking at the knuckleheads from Avenged Sevenfold. I despise your skull with bat wings logo. It is the only skull with wings logo that I never had a thing for. The one that's most curious to me, though, is the Skull and Bones society. We see it in the Pirates of the Caribbean movies, we've seen it in cartoons growing up and so forth (their logo anyway). Skull and crossed bones. The best part -- the number on the skull (or underneath it in some cases -- 322. Why? That's my birthday -- March 22. I'm sure I'm just over-analyzing it but hey, one can dream right?
Now what does the skull or skull with wings mean to me? Honestly, just effing coolness! I put that baby on and it's smooth sailing from there. For me, I have always loved how it has that sense of aggression, that sense of, "hey buddy, get the F out of my way" and that level of badassery . Symbol of death? Sure, why not! I dig it. If you're scared of death or have a sense of fear to it, then it ain't for you. As for me, I dig it. Why? In a strange twist, it also crawls its way back to my faith. When you get baptized, it's a way of putting your old self in a grave and in essence, death is happening and a birth is also happening. To a Christian, they have no business being scared of death. After all, even Johnny Cash sang what Paul said, "Oh death, where is thy sting? Oh grave, where is thy victory?". God seemed to have a cool angel to send out to kill the firstborn son of everyone that oppressed the Hebrews in Egypt. Heck, even Metallica wrote a song in memory to that, Creeping Death remember? The fact that Jesus died on the Hill of the Skull (Golgotha) has a buttkickin' sense of symbolism to it. Add in his resurrection and it's like making a fool out of death because it couldn't hold Him down. Where am I going with this? Absolutely nowhere, I just wanted to pour out my thoughts and feelings that come about when I think of skulls or skulls with wings and why I've never been offended but rather got a kick out of them.
Now on to another subject -- my weight. Dear God and thank heaven, I'm 235 right now! Now here's the retarded thing -- my weight-shifting issue from high school is back. I foresaw this but had the false hope that it wouldn't repeat itself. Back in my FDR days, one week I'd be 230, the next 240, drop down to 230 again, go up to 250, drop to 240, up to 260, drop down to 230 again and so on. All this in week intervals! Two weeks ago, I was 230 and then last week, I hit 258! By week's end, I went down to 252 and as of yesterday, I'm 235! I tried seeing if the scale was broke but hey, a five pound dumbbell weighed five pounds on those days I weighed myself. So clearly, by all means, my body is retarded. Maybe it's the humidity of NY summer weather, maybe it's all the water (or retention of it) but my body is clearly nuts! This keeps up and once I renew my health insurance, I'll look into a little bit of skin reduction because this is just wacky.
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